Musar Spiritual Curriculum- 2 March 2010: Bitachon- Trust
It is interesting to me that I would end my first Mussar month with a quote by the Vilna Gaon and find that my second month begins with a quote from him as well...
As I put January and my "Self Control" focus to rest I reflect on my chosen memory quotes:
"Man must deprive himself until he dies. Not by fasting or ascetism, but by controlling his mouth and his desires. This is Teshuvah.”
“There is no better way to merit eternity than by guarding one’s tongue. This is more important than all the Torah and all good deeds.”
And now my spiritual curriculum pivots into March, or, Bitachon "Trust".
"Bitachon (trust in G-d) and Histapkus (being content with what you have) are general principles for all good character traits. And they are the opposite of desire and greed. And the central factor of everything is Bitachon... All sins come from desire/greed… Therefore histapkus which is the opposite (of "do not covet") is a foundation for the entire torah and it means to believe with emuna shlema (whole faith) to not worry about tomorrow. And he whose heart is good with bitachon even though he has transgressed severe sins, he is better than one who is missing in bitachon because such a person (who lacks bitachon) will come to jealousies and hatred and even though he studies torah and is involved in good deeds, all of this is only to make a name for himself."
I am not big on trusting G-d. I often think and feel that I know better than the orchestrator of the universe and history. Although I know at my core that this is not so I'm bad about living in light of it...
So this month my focus will be in becoming a better "truster"... I know in my heart that trusting in the ultimate ground of my being and the mother/father of all humanity is a good move.... but the doing of it is hard.
The flat tire... the broken pipe... the accident... the health issue... the lost job... the friend or relative making destructive life choices... all in the purview of a loving and kind being who is aware... who cares.
I'm reminded that ultimately belief is a choice. I also remember the scene from the mini-series "Holocaust" in which the rabbi and a young man are talking... The young man says, "With all that is going on around us how can you believe in G-d?” To which the rabbi responds, "With all that is going on around us how can you not believe in G-d?”
Help me HaShem; mother/father G-d to grow in trusting you and seeing all things as ultimately from your hand... and recognizing that all that occurs will be used by you to bring forth your perfect goodness in the time and space of our minuscule lives.
2 Step Practical Advice (From http://dafyomireview.com/article.php?docid=125)
1. Constantly ask H-shem for help
Before you proceed on anything, ask Him' for help.
Example: Salesman in waiting room. "Ribono Shel Olam, give me success with this customer."
Or if you want to learn a gemora, say "H-shem, give me success in learning this subject in the gemora."
Or if you're going for a walk, ask Hashem to give you success in crossing all the streets safely.
2. Thank H-shem no matter the outcome.
If it happens that you are successful, thank H-shem profusely, at length afterwards and always consider what He did for you.
Even if you were not successful, you should still thank Hashem because whatever happens is certainly for your benefit.
Rav Miller says that this method will train you to learn to attribute everything that happens to you comes from G-d and is for the best.
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